“I imagine you come across a number of people who are disconcerted by the difference between what you do feel and what they fancy you ought to feel. It is fatal to pay the smallest attention to them.”
In this quote by Dorothy L. Sayers, she advises not to be swayed by others' expectations of what we should feel versus what we actually feel. This can be interpreted as a reminder to stay true to oneself and not allow external opinions to dictate one's emotions or beliefs. By disregarding others' judgments and staying authentic to one's own feelings, one can maintain their sense of self-identity and integrity.
In today's society, the pressure to conform to societal norms and expectations can be overwhelming. However, Dorothy L. Sayers reminds us of the importance of staying true to ourselves and our own feelings. By disregarding the opinions of others and embracing our authentic selves, we empower ourselves to live fully and genuinely. It is crucial to remember that our own feelings and emotions are valid, regardless of how they may differ from what others believe we should feel.
"I imagine you come across a number of people who are disconcerted by the difference between what you do feel and what they fancy you ought to feel. It is fatal to pay the smallest attention to them." - Dorothy L. Sayers
When we reflect on the quote by Dorothy L. Sayers about not paying attention to others' expectations, we may find ourselves considering how often we allow outside influences to dictate our emotions and reactions. Here are some questions to help guide your reflection:
“What are you to do with the people who are cursed with both hearts and brains?”
“[I]t's difficult to make people see that what you have been taught counts for nothing, and that the only things worth having are the things you find out for yourself. Also, that when so many brands of what Chesterton calls 'fancy souls' and theories of life are offered you, there is no sense in not looking pretty carefully to see what you are going in for. [...] It isn't a case of 'Here is the Christian religion, the one authoritative and respectable rule of life. Take it or leave it'. It's 'Here's a muddling kind of affair called Life, and here are nineteen or twenty different explanations of it, all supported by people whose opinions are not to be sneezed at. Among them is the Christian religion in which you happpen to have been brought up. Your friend so-and-so has been brought up in quite a different way of thinking; is a perfectly splendid person and thoroughly happy. What are you going to do about it?' -- I'm worrying it out quietly, and whatever I get hold of will be valuable, because I've got it for myself; but really, you know, the whole question is not as simple as it looks.”
“And what do all the great words come to in the end, but that? I love you- I am at rest with you- I have come home.”
“What we ask is to be human individuals, however peculiar and unexpected. It is no good saying: "You are a little girl and therefore you ought to like dolls"; if the answer is, "But I don't," there is no more to be said.”
“In reaction against the age-old slogan, "woman is the weaker vessel," or the still more offensive, "woman is a divine creature," we have, I think, allowed ourselves to drift into asserting that "a woman is as good as a man," without always pausing to think what exactly we mean by that. What, I feel, we ought to mean is something so obvious that it is apt to escape attention altogether, viz: (...) that a woman is just as much an ordinary human being as a man, with the same individual preferences, and with just as much right to the tastes and preferences of an individual. What is repugnant to every human being is to be reckoned always as a member of a class and not as an individual person.”
“And by the way, my dear,' he said, 'you might just mention to Mrs. Sutton that if she must read the morning paper before I come down, I should be obliged if she would fold it neatly afterwards.' 'What an old fuss-box you are, darling,' said his wife. Mr. Mummery sighed. He could not explain that it was somehow important that the morning paper should come to him fresh and prim, like a virgin.Women did not feel these things. ("Suspicion")”