“Bewildered is the fox who lives to find that grapes beyond reach can be really sour.”

“A hangover is the wrath of grapes.”

“Yet, as only New Yorkers know, if you can get through the twilight, you'll live through the night.”

“Woman wants monogamy;Man delights in novelty.Love is woman's moon and sun;Man has other forms of fun.Woman lives but in her lord;Count to ten, and man is bored.With this the gist and sum of it,What earthly good can come of it?”

“I find her anecdotes more efficacious than sheep-counting, rain on a tin roof, or alanol tablets.... you will find me and Morpheus, off in a corner, necking.”

“The sweeter the apple, the blacker the core. Scratch a lover and find a foe.”

“If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they’re happy.”