“Out in Hollywood, where the streets are paved with Goldwyn....”

“I know this will come as a shock to you, Mr. Goldwyn, but in all history, which has held billions and billions of human beings, not a single one ever had a happy ending.”

“The only “ism” Hollywood believes in is plagiarism.”

“Where's the man that could ease a heart like a satin gown?”

“Misfortune, and recited misfortune especially, can be prolonged to the point where it ceases to excite pity and arouses only irritation.”

“Like many a better one before me, I have gone down under the force of numbers, under the books and books and books that keep coming out and coming out and coming out, shoals of them, spates of them, flash floods of them, too blame many books, and no sign of an end.”

“The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires.”