“Would you like to see the menu?" he said, "or would you like meet the Dish of the Day?"...“Good evening,” it lowed and sat back heavily on its haunches, “I am the main Dish of the Day. May I interest you in parts of my body?”

“The waiter approached.'Would you like to see the menu?' he said. 'Or would you like to meet the Dish of the Day?''Huh?' said Ford. 'Huh?' said Arthur.'Huh?' said Trillian.'That’s cool,' said Zaphod. 'We'll meet the meat.”

“Good evening," it lowed and sat back heavily on its haunches, "I am the main Dish of the Day. May I interest you in parts of my body? It harrumphed and gurgled a bit, wriggled its hind quarters into a more comfortable position and gazed peacefully at them.Its gaze was met by looks of startled bewilderment from Arthur and Trillian, a resigned shrug from Ford Prefect and naked hunger from Zaphod Beeblebrox."Something off the shoulder perhaps?" suggested the animal. "Braised in a white wine sauce?""Er, your shoulder?" said Arthur in a horrified whisper."But naturally my shoulder, sir," mooed the animal contentedly, "nobody else's is mine to offer."Zaphod leapt to his feet and started prodding and feeling the animal's shoulder appreciatively."Or the rump is very good," murmured the animal. "I've been exercising it and eating plenty of grain, so there's a lot of good meat there." It gave a mellow grunt, gurgled again and started to chew the cud. It swallowed the cud again."Or a casserole of me perhaps?" it added."You mean this animal actually wants us to eat it?" whispered Trillian to Ford."Me?" said Ford, with a glazed look in his eyes. "I don't mean anything.""That's absolutely horrible," exclaimed Arthur, "the most revolting thing I've ever heard.""What's the problem, Earthman?" said Zaphod, now transferring his attention to the animal's enormous rump."I just don't want to eat an animal that's standing there inviting me to," said Arthur. "It's heartless.""Better than eating an animal that doesn't want to be eaten," said Zaphod."That's not the point," Arthur protested. Then he thought about it for a moment. "All right," he said, "maybe it is the point. I don't care, I'm not going to think about it now. I'll just ... er ..."The Universe raged about him in its death throes."I think I'll just have a green salad," he muttered."May I urge you to consider my liver?" asked the animal, "it must be very rich and tender by now, I've been force-feeding myself for months.""A green salad," said Arthur emphatically."A green salad?" said the animal, rolling his eyes disapprovingly at Arthur."Are you going to tell me," said Arthur, "that I shouldn't have green salad?""Well," said the animal, "I know many vegetables that are very clear on that point. Which is why it was eventually decided to cut through the whole tangled problem and breed an animal that actually wanted to be eaten and was capable of saying so clearly and distinctly. And here I am."It managed a very slight bow."Glass of water please," said Arthur."Look," said Zaphod, "we want to eat, we don't want to make a meal of the issues. Four rare steaks please, and hurry. We haven't eaten in five hundred and seventy-six thousand million years."The animal staggered to its feet. It gave a mellow gurgle."A very wise choice, sir, if I may say so. Very good," it said. "I'll just nip off and shoot myself."He turned and gave a friendly wink to Arthur."Don't worry, sir," he said, "I'll be very humane."It waddled unhurriedly off to the kitchen.A matter of minutes later the waiter arrived with four huge steaming steaks.”

“I like the cover," he said. "Don't Panic. It's the first helpful or intelligible thing anybody's said to me all day.”

“You may not instantly see why I bring the subject up, but that is because my mind works so phenomenally fast, and I am at a rough estimate thirty billion times more intelligent than you. Let me give you an example. Think of a number, any number.”“Er, five,” said the mattress.“Wrong,” said Marvin. “You see?”

“I have a well-deserved reputation for being something of a gadget freak, and am rarely happier than when spending an entire day programming my computer to perform automatically a task that would otherwise take me a good ten seconds to do by hand.”

“You cannot see what I see because you see what you see. You cannot know what I know because you know what you know. What I see and what I know cannot be added to what you see and what you know because they are not of the same kind. Neither can it replace what you see and what you know, because that would be to replace you yourself.""Hang on, can I write this down?" said Arthur, excitedly fumbling in his pocket for a pencil.”