“There are a number of things a woman can tell about a man who is roughly twenty-nine years old,sitting in the cab of a pickup truck at 3:37 in the afternoon on a weekday, facing the Pacific,writing furiously on the back of pink invoice slips. Such a man may or may not be employed, butregardless, there is mystery there. If this man is with a dog, then that's good, because it means he'scapable of forming relationships. But if the dog is a male dog, that's probably a bad sign, becauseit means the guy is likely a dog, too. A girl dog is much better, but if the guy is over thirty, anykind of dog is a bad sign regardless, because it means he's stopped trusting humans altogether. Ingeneral, if nothing else, guys my age with dogs are going to be work.Then there's stubble: stubble indicates a possible drinker, but if he's driving a van or a pickuptruck, he hasn't hit bottom yet, so watch out, honey. A guy writing something on a clipboardwhile facing the ocean at 3:37 P.M. may be writing poetry, or he may be writing a letter beggingsomeone for forgiveness. But if he's writing real words, not just a job estimate or somethingbusiness-y, then more likely than not this guy has something emotional going on, which couldmean he has a soul.”

“Any man with money to make the purchase may become a dog's owner. But no man --spend he ever so much coin and food and tact in the effort-- may become a dog's Master without consent of the dog. Do you get the difference? And he whom a dog once unreservedly accepts as Master is forever that dog's God.”

“She blinked. "Hmm? Oh, don't care. What did Anubis look like to you?""What did... he looked like a guy. So?""A good-looking guy, or a slobbering dog-headed guy?""I guess... Not the dog-headed guy.""I knew it!" Sadie pointed at me as if she'd won an argument."Good-looking. I knew it!"And with a ridiculous grin, she spun around and skipped into the house. My sister, as I may have mentioned, is a little strange.”

“A dog is not considered a good dog because he is a good barker. A man is not considered a good man because he is a good talker.”

“Why don't you write a story for me?”“Really?” I squeaked. “Um, what about?”“Well, something with a good guy and a bad guy and a hot chick.”…”Okay, anything else?”“The hot chick has to have pretty blonde hair and kickass blue eyes,”….”And the good guy is a musically talented man who is incredibly sexy...?”He grinned and kissed me. “Not at all – that's the bad guy. And I don't care if he wins or loses – that doesn't make a difference.” He shifted and hovered over me, kissing me again – and again and again and again...His lips lingered over mine as he whispered: “I just want the bad guy to get the girl.”

“Zaphod Beeblebrox crawled bravely along a tunnel, like the hell of a guy he was. He was very confused, but he continued crawling doggedly anyway because he was that brave.”