“I think I want a guy who eats vegetables. And who isn't so normal. He was just a muffin, you know?”

“It was like either: (A) I was a terrible guy who was knowingly doing this rotten thing over and over, or (B) it wasn’t so rotten, really, just normal, and the way to confirm it was normal was to keep doing it, over and over.”

“Why don't you want a boyfriend?""I don't know. Maybe I do. I'd just have to meet the right guy. Someone who isn't ordinary. Someone who get someone I fit perfectly with. I want heat, chemistry, an undeniable connection. You know what I mean? I want it all. I'm done with ordinary and mediocre.”

“Yes, fruits and vegetables are healthy. But you want to know why I eat them? Revenge.”

“When I am in trouble, eating is the only thing that consoles me. Indeed, when I am in really great trouble, as any one who knows me intimately will tell you, I refuse everything except food and drink. At the present moment I am eating muffins because I am unhappy. Besides, I am particularly fond of muffins.”

“Good heavens, I suppose a man may eat his own muffins in his own garden.""But you have just said it was perfectly heartless to eat muffins!""I said it was perfectly heartless of YOU under the circumstances. That is a very different thing.""That may be, but the muffins are the same!”