“Cake or death?”

“Cake and tea or death?”

“And then earlier than that there were the crusades. The crusades were totally fucked. Richard the Lionheart, who had the heart of a lion as well as his own. He ripped it out of the lion, and the lion was left with a bicycle pump and not much to do.”

“They say that 'Guns don't kill people, people kill people.' Well I think the gun helps. If you just stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.”

“You piss me off you Salmon... You're too expensive in restaurants.”

“What have you been reading, The Gospel according to St. Bastard?!”

“I am an evil Giraffe.”