“A nasty letter or a sarcastic one can make you righteously angry, but what can you do about a polite letter of rejection? Nothing, really, except cry.”

“I sent a lot of publishing ideas to my publisher, about 30 of them. Each time except 3, i got a "rejection letter". This is basically what a rejection letter is like:Hello Pathetic Moron,We read your book. It sucked. Don't send us another one. If you do, we will run over your grandmother with a bus. Don't Do It.From, Your Publisher”

“Why use a 10 letter word you can barely pronounce...when a four letter one will do.”

“What are letters?”“Kinda like mediaglyphics except they’re all black, and they’re tiny, they don’t move, they’re old and boring and really hard to read. But you can use ’em to make short words for long words.”

“A struggling writer, 'I get hundreds of rejection letters each day. I am depressed with this life, Can you please help?' The Wise-man, 'No, I can’t help. It is good that you are being rejected. The more you get rejection letters, the better your writing will become. Always remember, first they will reject you, then they... ignore you, then they will laugh at you and finally, they may accept you.”

“I just don't know how to write a love letter. What can you say to a girl that shows you really like her?""How about, enclosed please find a cookie?”