“Vitamins ruined my life. Not that there was much left to ruin, but still. I know that blaming vitamins for my horrible life sounds strange. After all, vitamins are supposed to keep people healthy. Also, they're inanimate objects. But thanks to them I was stuck in the Jackson Center Mall watching my father run around in a bee costume.”

“Always Remember to take your Vitamins: Take your Vitamin A for ACTION, Vitamin B for Belief, Vitamin C for Confidence ,Vitamin D for Discipline, Vitamin E for Enthusiasm!!”

“My clothes are made of monosodium glutamate and hexachlorophene. My food is made of polyester, rayon and lurex. My rug lotions contain vitamins. Do my vitamins feature cleaning agents? I hope so. My brain is gimmicked by a microprocessor the size of a quark, and costing ten pee and running the whole deal. I am made of — junk, I’m just junk.”

“Comparing the bioavailability of all other oral vitamin C delivery with your oral liposomal delivery is like comparing a squirt gun to a fire hose. Not only am I convinced that the efficacy of Lypo-Spheric(tm) Vitamin C far surpasses any traditional oral vitamin C supplement, but my recent personal experience with it suggests that it may sometimes be better than IV injection.”

“Talk was like the vitamins of our friendship: Large daily doses kept it healthy.”

“Vitamin C is the world’s best natural antibiotic, antiviral, antitoxin and antihistamine. This book’s recurring emphasis on vitamin C might suggest that I am offering a song with only one verse. Not so. As English literature concentrates on Shakespeare, so orthomolecular (megavitamin) therapy concentrates on vitamin C. Let the greats be given their due. The importance of vitamin C cannot be overemphasised.”