“I'm selling my V-card,”
“My aim is to agitate and disturb people. I'm not selling bread; I'm selling yeast.”
“I assumed it was someone trying to sell me something. They're always calling to sell. Once they said if I sent in a check for $99 I'd be pre-approved for a credit card, and I said, Right, sure, and if I step under a pigeon I'm preapproved for a load of shit”
“I went to Hallmark, but they don’t sell corridors there. I did, however, find a card that perfectly summed up our relationship. The card was blank.”
“Sell my old clothes - I'm off to heaven”
“I believe in me. And my family does. And Mrs. V. It's the rest of the world I'm not so sure of.”