“People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, no, I was an accountant. ”

“If people ask me,I always tell them:"Quite well, thank you, I'm very glad to say."If people ask me, I always answer,"Quite well, thank you, how are you today?"I always answer, I always tell them, If they ask mePolitely...BUT SOMETIMES I wish That they wouldn't”

“People always ask me if I’m into sports, and I say, “Well, isn’t writing a sport? If you’re doing it right, and you have a deadline, you should be sweating.”

“In a classical joke a child stays behind after school to ask a personal question. "Teacher, what did I learn today? " The surprised teacher asks, "Why do you ask that?" and the child replies, "Daddy always asks me and I never know what to say".”

“What are you?" I whispered. "What are you?" Offended, I frowned. "Human." "Funny, me too." "No, you're not." "Funny, neither are you." I set my jaw and glared. What a jerk. "Why did you come here?" My voice came from his mouth, disconcerting as always. "I could ask you the same thing. Are you going to kill me?”

“You think you’re a pretty funny guy, don’t you?”“Well, I don’t want to brag…”“You know what’s really funny?” Geryon asks, taking another step toward the cell.“Your face?”