“...and he's wearing some exotic cologne that makes me want to eat him.”

“Don't botherMe with promises. Vows are cheaply manufactured,come with no guarantees.Don't bother to say youloveme. The word is indefinable.Joy to some, heartbreakto others, depending oncircumstance. Thereis evidence that the emotioncan make a person live longer,evidence it can kill you early.I think it's akin toa deadlydisease. Or at least some exotic fever. Catch it, andyou'd better, quick, swallowsome medication to use as a weaponagainst the fire ravagingbody and soul.”

“Do you know how beautiful you are?' I shook my head 'I'm not. But you make me fell like I am.' I wanted to be beautiful. To him. For him. I didn't care how anybody else saw me. Only Ethan.”

“I don't love him, & he definitely doesn't love me. Still, he semi-fills a gaping black hole inside me. That place wants love, maybe even needs love, but love is something I"m pretty sure doesn't exist.”

“Always before, I just said no, left it solidly there. I waver now. I want to share everything with him. Want to know what he knows, feel what he feels, share the same space he's in.”

“And the thought of that makes me want to open a vein, experience pain, know I'm alive, despite this living death.”

“i expected demands. he gifted me with tenderness. i expected ego. he let me experiment. i expected disrespect. he called me beautiful. i expected him to expect perfection. he taught me all i needed to know.”