“So when he asked about getting high, I didn't think, I agreed. We smoked some good California green. Took three tries to put me in the place he said I should be.”

“Yeah, I know getting high isn't so smart. Ask me if I care.”

“I fell into a big pit of black depression. That happens sometimes, when too much shit gets flung at me at once. It's like all the external pressure sucks into me, then tries to escape again. But it can't. So it builds. Throbs. Makes me feel like my skin is anxious to split. I think that feeling is why some people cut - little slices so they don't shred completely.”

“Face red, but brave in spite of it, Ethan offered an even smaller box. My hands shook as i opened it.Set in a gold promise ring, three small diamonds glittered. One for you, one for me, one for us, he said sweetly. I love you.”

“Heart Breaking,I think that if Dad, staring down the sight of a 10mm,would only tell me he loves me,I could easily change my mind......but he won't.”

“i expected demands. he gifted me with tenderness. i expected ego. he let me experiment. i expected disrespect. he called me beautiful. i expected him to expect perfection. he taught me all i needed to know.”

“I don't love him, & he definitely doesn't love me. Still, he semi-fills a gaping black hole inside me. That place wants love, maybe even needs love, but love is something I"m pretty sure doesn't exist.”