“The dead center of existence: when it is all the same to you whether you read a newspaper article or think about God.”

“Briefly stated, the Gell-Mann Amnesia effect is as follows. You open the newspaper to an article on some subject you know well. In Murray's case, physics. In mine, show business. You read the article and see the journalist has absolutely no understanding of either the facts or the issues. Often, the article is so wrong it actually presents the story backward—reversing cause and effect. I call these the "wet streets cause rain" stories. Paper's full of them.In any case, you read with exasperation or amusement the multiple errors in a story, and then turn the page to national or international affairs, and read as if the rest of the newspaper was somehow more accurate about Palestine than the baloney you just read. You turn the page, and forget what you know.”

“You see that one man will give a reward for the recovery of his tup, while another will only give thanks for the rescue of his wife. I suggest to you that one need not read the articles in the newspaper at all, for here - in the humble notices - all humanity is laid bare.”

“You grow up readings about pirates and cowboys and spacemen and stuff, and just when you think the world's all full of amazing things, they tell you it's really all dead whales and chopped-down forests and nuclear waste hanging about millions of years.”

“If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.”

“There exists no God. What exists is godliness, and that godliness surrounds you. We are all in the same ocean.”