“I was one of those people who stumbled into things, who followed whims and took side roads, instead of finding some goal to pursue forward with unflagging commitment. I didn't even know what I wanted to be when I grew up, what I wanted to major in when I went to college. And I had always been blithely convinced that if I followed the side roads for long enough I'd trip over something wonderful, that thing you never know you're looking for until you land on it that suddenly makes the universe a much bigger place than it ever had been before.”

“There was this girl,” I said. "l mean-” All of a sudden I felt flustered, and added, ”We were just friends.””No such thing.””We were.””Look. Despite what you may have heard, people have sex all the time with people they don't love, or particulary care about, or sometimes can't even stand. So why in the world do people say that it's just friends, like it doesn't mean as much, if you're not having sex? Real friendship is true and forever and with all your heart. It's not Relationship Lite.”

“I sat there in the darkness, with their skin clsoe to me, and I felt lifted up and wrapped with kindness. And very small, because I didn't deserve this, but small the way a mouse in its den is small: warm and safe and protected.”

“I don't want balance. What I want is the brick! I want to find the one thing in my life that, if I get that right, it doesn't matter what the world throws onto the other side of the scale.”

“I wondered where the person was who had taken my place, who wanted to know what news people had been told. I'm always looking for the person who replaces me, who thinks the things I do, who fills in for me when I'm not there. I know there is someone younger than me doing what I did and someone older doing what I will do, and someone my age being just like me.”

“how much have i changed. i was a parent-pleaser, a dutiful friend. i made safe, careful choices and hoped that things would fall into place for me. but i have learned that you make your own happiness, that part of going for what you want means losing something else. and when the stakes are high, the losses can be that much greater”

“I love you. I mean that, all right? I don't know what kind of guys you've been dating in college, but I'm over the novelty of not living with my parents and having my own king size bed. Really.” I couldn't help it. I laughed. That was a new twist in the Talk I'd never heard before.”