“Sometimes I'm real cool, but sometimes I could be a real asshole. I think everyone is like that.”
“When you're a guy you have to act like an asshole sometimes, so that the real asswholes won't bug you.”
“↑ top up position downThe fact that I suspect I'm an asshole means I probably am not, because a real asshole doesn't think he's an asshole, does he? Therefore, by realizing that I'm an asshole, I am in fact negating that very realization, am I not? Descartes's Asshole Axiom: I think I am; therefor I'm not one.”
“Sometimes I wish I could just be like everyone else my age and not think at all.”
“Sometimes I don't know whether I'm real or whether I'm a character in one of my novels.”
“Sometimes," he sighed, "I think the things I remember are more real than the things I see. ”