“What started Baby Jesus growing in Mary's tummy was an angel zoomed down, like a ghost but a really cool one with feathers. Mary was all surprised, she said, "How can this be?" and then, "OK let it be." When Baby Jesus popped out of her vagina on Christmas she put him in a manger but not for the cows to chew, only to warm him up with their blowing because he was magic.”

“No touching Baby Jesus.”“But we’re his parents!” proclaimed Mary Beth, who was being generous to include poor Joseph under this appellation.“Mary Beth,” Barb Wiggin said, “if you touch the Baby Jesus, I’m putting you in a cow costume.”

“I must be getting back to my rooms,” Silence said and stood.Mick frowned with displeasure. “Why?”“Because of Mary Darling.”He shrugged. “One o’ the maids is watchin’ her.”“But if Mary wakes she’ll want me.”“Why?” he asked again, biting into a sweetmeat. This discussion wasn’t to his fancy, but sparring with her was.“Because,” she said slowly, looking at him as if he were lack-witted, “she’s only a baby and she loves me.”“Babies,” Mick pronounced, “are a great trouble.”She shook her head, not bothering to reply this time, and started marching to the door.”

“did jesus have a baby sister? was she bitter?was she sweet?did she wind up in a convent? did she end up on the street? on the run?on the stage? did she dance? did he have a sister? a little baby sister? did jesus have a sister? did they give her a chance?did he have a baby sister? could she speak out by and large?or was she told by mother mary ask your brother he’s in charge he’s the whipped creamon the cakedid he have a sister? a little baby sister? did jesus have a sister? did they give her a break?her brother’s birth announcement was pretty big pretty bigi guess while she got precious little notice in the local press her mother was the virgin when she carried him carried him thereinif the little girl came later thenwas she conceived in sin? and in sorrow?and in shame? did jesus have a sister? what was her name?and did she long to be the savior saving everyone she met?and in private to her mirror did she whisper saviorette?saviorwoman?saviorperson?save your breath! did he have a sister? a little baby sister? did jesus have a sister? was she there at his death?and did she cry for mary’s comfort as she watched himon the cross? and was mary too despairing ask your brother he’s the bosshe’s the chief he’s the man he’s the show did he have a sister? a little baby sister? did jesus have a sister? doesn’t anyone know?”

“In one corner of the square is a manger scene with two live sheep, a bed of hay, a couple of cows. The baby Jesus is a brown-faced doll lying in his crib, but Mary and Joseph are real and dressed in period garb. Joseph hoists a staff, Mary sports her virginal blue robes. As I walked by the other day, Joseph balanced on the crib, light bulb in hand, reaching toward an electrical socket. Mary, I guess, was taking a break. She sat on the edge of the crib. Her blue robes were hiked high enough to reveal Doc Marten boots beneath. She sipped a can of Coke and smoked.”

“Did you hear about the lawsuit? Mary asked."No, what?""I hear that he is so big," she lifted her eyebrows to indicate what she meant, "that he put a girl in the hospital and she is suing him, because she can never have babies because of him.""Ewwwwwwwwwww!!!!" the sisters chorused."Could a guy really do that?" Lydia asked.Elizabeth shrugged. "I guess, but he would have to be the size of a friggin' oak tree.”