“I never realized how much of the pleasure of dining out is watching people, otherwise it feels like ordering in with better utensils.”

“Being back here—I'm suddenly confronting the enormity of that kind of commitment. And just how much you can fuck someone up if you half-ass it.”

“The ceremonial oat tour." She reaches in the shopping bag and takes out the milk bar with almonds, ripping it open."It must be so hard for guys in relationships - to have just one girlfriend completely devoted to taking care of all your whole-grain needs. I can see how at the first opportunity you'd just have to get out there and - sow.”

“I've learned that hurting you feels infinitely worse than being hurt myself.”

“You should totally get implants," she said admiringly in the mirror. I shake my head. "I don't yet know what I'm going to do with my life, Diane. But I'm hoping being shaped like a barbell could only be a hindrance.”

“Rule number one: caffeine is your new best friend. Liquid optimism.”

“To all the guys who broke our hearts - we wouldn't appreciate what we have today without you.”