“She forces me to endure this ridiculous therapy, when the so-called counselors are little better than misguided do-gooders with degrees.-Artemis Fowl”

“Artemis: (shocked) Why, Doctor? This is a sensitive area. For all you know I could be suffering from depression. Doctor Po: I suppose you could. Is that the case? Artemis: (head in hands) It's my mother, Doctor. Doctor Po: Yes? Artemis: My mother, she... Doctor Po: Your mother, yes? Artemis: She forces me to endure this ridiculous therapy when the school's so-called counsellors are little better than misguided do-gooders with degrees.”

“Artemis Fowl will never be secondary.""I thought you were Artemis Fowl the Second?" said Holly.”

“gold is power-artemis fowl I liked the artemis fowl series because its about a boy genius”

“That will be her undoing," gasped Artemis, already suffering under the weight of the flak jacket. "Artemis Fowl will never be secondary.""I thought you were Artemis Fowl the Second?" said Holly.”

“(about his terrible attempt at making a sandwich) It's more difficult than it looks. (Artemis Fowl)”