“The two of them went down in a heap, with not even a turkey to break their fall.”

“I just pulled a pretty big job and needed to hide out for awhile." "...Where's all the loot?""That, as my cousin Nord would say, is where my improvised lie falls apart." Artemis put two and two together and arrived at a very unpleasant four."You were here to rob me!""No, I wasn't. How dare you?!”

“The person who sat the kid down on the breadboard to cut off thier diaper with a huge knife was the most elderly person in the family, who was blind in one eye..and had the shakes....of course the kids uncouncious, He's lost two pints of blood!”

“All we can hope for is that he will fall into the ocean with a bar of soap in his pocket.”

“Hey, look—your girlfriend is saying something."Artemis had a vast mental reserve of scathing comebacks at his disposal, but none of them covered girlfriend insults. He wasn't even sure if it was an insult. And if it was, who was being insulted? Him or the girl?”

“It took teams of LEP warlocks to slow down time for a few hours; the magic required to open a door to the tunnel was stupendous. It would be easier to shoot down the moon.Opal tapped this into her notepad.Reminder. Shoot down the moon? Viable?”

“A pity to survive night flights over St. Georges Channel only to crack my skull falling from a ladder.”