“Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?”

“Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.”

“When your mother asks, "Do you want a piece of advice?" it's a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no. You're going to get it anyway.”

“As a child, my number one best friend was the librarian in my grade school. I actually believed all those books belonged to her.”

“Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere”

“I love my mother for all the times she said absolutely nothing.... Thinking back on it all, it must have been the most difficult part of mothering she ever had to do: knowing the outcome, yet feeling she had no right to keep me from charting my own path. I thank her for all her virtues, but mostly for never once having said, "I told you so.”

“It goes without saying that you should never have more children than you have car windows”