“Housework is a treadmill from futility to oblivion with stop-offs at tedium and counter productivity.”

“Housework can kill you if done right.”

“Housework, if it is done properly, can cause brain damage.”

“My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?”

“Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the 'Titanic' who waved off the dessert cart.”

“Have you any idea how many children it takes to turn off one light in the kitchen Three. It takes one to say What light and two more to say I didn't turn it on.”

“I come from a home where gravy is a beverage.”