“Written on her tombstone: "I told you I was sick.”
“You are a sick, sick man,” I told him.“Thank you,” Ben replied, looking modest.”
“If the Confederacy falls, there should be written on its tombstone: Died of a theory.”
“The first thing she told me after I hit on her was that she had a boyfriend of nine months, and I thought, what kind of sick bitch dates infants?”
“Some writers enjoy writing, I am told. Not me. I enjoy having written.”
“I love you, Freckles. The smartest thing I ever did was come to Tombstone to romance Willie Vaughn.”