“Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.”

“Always keep your mouth shut with a drunk. You can never win with piss tanks. The most you can hope for is to break even.”

“All you have to do, I tell myself, is keep your mouth shut and look stupid. It shouldn't be that hard.”

“So go on, get angry. But keep your mouth shut and go do your work.”

“There are, I have discovered, ten commandments for mother-in-law. These rules are not mine. They come from mothers-in-law of every color, race, class, and disposition. Given the diversity of the women, the uniformity of opinion on this compels attention -- also discussion. Here are the ten most recommended rules:1. Keep your mouth shut.2. Keep your mouth shut.3. Keep your mouth shut.4. Keep your mouth shut.5. Keep your mouth shut.6. Keep your mouth shut.7. Keep your mouth shut.8. Keep your mouth shut.9. Keep your mouth shut.10. Keep your mouth shut.”

“He had had much experience of physicians, and said 'the only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd druther not'.”