“A frequent exchange of text messages is not a relationship. It's not even a pen-pal.”

“Just because something is addictive doesn't mean that you will get addicted to it. But . . . if your stomach ties up in knots while you count the seconds waiting for a phone call from that special someone . . . if you hear a loud buzzing in your ears when you see a certain person's car (or one just like it) . . . if your eyes burn when you hear a random love song or see a couple holding hands . . . if you suffer the twin agonies of craving for and withdrawing from a series of unrequited crushes or toxic relationships . . . if you always feel like you're clutching at someone's ankle and dragged across the floor as they try to leave the room . . . welcome to the club.”

“My fear of abandonment is exceeded only by my terror of intimacy.”

“I have done the journey between Tientsin and Peking so many times that I recognize even the stray dogs (known locally as wonks) that frequent the platforms in the hopes of picking up something thrown out from the carriage windows.”

“The verb 'to darn' is explained in my pocket dictionary as follows: 'To mend by imitating the texture of the stuff, with thread and needle.' But this definition does not correspond to the work accomplished by good Chinese housewives. When they mend a sock, they do not try 'to imitate the texture of the stuff'. Their art makes no attempt at concealment: it even takes a certain pride in revealing itself.”

“Diplomacy is the art of letting someone else have your way.”

“Diplomacy is the art of letting other people have your way.”