“I knew it. I knew it. Born in a hotel room - and God damn it - died in a hotel room.”

“I did it again. Lying guilty in a hotel room for a woman I will fail for.”

“Nineteenth-century preacher Henry Ward Beecher's last words were "Now comes the mystery." The poet Dylan Thomas, who liked a good drink at least as much as Alaska, said, "I've had eighteen straight whiskeys. I do believe that's a record," before dying. Alaska's favorite was playwright Eugene O'Neill: "Born in a hotel room, and--God damn it--died in a hotel room." Even car-accident victims sometimes have time for last words. Princess Diana said, "Oh God. What's happened?" Movie star James Dean said, "They've got to see us," just before slamming his Porsche into another car. I know so many last words. But I will never know hers.”

“Hotel rooms inhabit a separate moral universe.”

“I'm so fast that last night I turned off the light switch in my hotel room and was in bed before the room was dark.”

“Why was I mad? Because he'd surprised me with a really nice hotel room. What a bastard.”