“The bluff on which Natchez sat was huge, and the road zigged and zagged and curled and twisted and dropped— like something Dr. Seuss might have imagined in a book titled The Cat in the Hat Drinks Blood.”

“Admitting that Katie had taken too much blood was on par with saying an adult human had pooped their pants or eaten their own boogers!”

“I figured even the most jaded and cynical inhabitant might report a bloody girl in a party dress carrying a severed head by its hair.”

“Sometimes when the poop hits the fan we should block it and run, sometimes we should haul off and knock it for a loop back at the spinning blades. Wisdom is knowing two things. One is which time is which. The other is that no matter what you do you're gonna get crap on your hand.”

“Men who had the capacity to apologize—and who knew the right words with which to do it—were few and far between.”

“Yeah. You treat him like a son or a soldier, instead of like a brother. He wants you to like him and admire him and love him. Maybe in that order.”

“Vamps who are dying, or think they are, give a piercing, eardrum-bursting shriek, like the love child of a screech owl and a mountain lion on crystal meth, amplified like a seventies rock band.”