“Success didn't spoil me, I've always been insufferable.”

“When Toni Morrison said 'write the book you want to read,' she didn't mean everybody.”

“Having been unpopular in high school is not just cause for book publications. ”

“I must take issue with the term 'a mere child,' for it has been my invariable experience that the company of a mere child is infinitely preferable to that of a mere adult.”

“It's much easier to write a solemn book than a funny book. It's harder to make people laugh than it is to make them cry. People are always on the verge of tears.”

“People have been cooking and eating for thousands of years, so if you are the very first to have thought of adding lime juice to scalloped potatoes try to understand there must be a reason for this.”

“To me the outdoors is what you must pass through in order to get from your apartment into a taxicab.”