“California is a fine place to live, if you happen to be an orange.”

“You only live once. But if you work it right, once is enough.”

“You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a fruit fly and still have room enough for three caraway seeds and a producer’s heart.”

“Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of six strange men whose only objective is to make a hole in one with you. ”

“A gentleman is any man who wouldn't hit a woman with his hat on.”

“I like long walks, especially when they're taken by people who annoy me.”

“A conference is a gathering of important people who singly can do nothing, but together can decide that nothing can be done.”