“I will tell you that I am a child of this century, a child of disbelief and doubt. I am that today and will remain so until the grave. How much terrible torture this thirst for faith has cost me and costs me even now, which is all the stronger in my soul the more arguments I can find against it. And yet, God sends me sometimes instants when I am completely calm; at those instants I love and feel loved by others, and it is at those instances that I have shaped for myself a Credo where everything is clear and sacred for me. This Credo is very simple, here it is: to believe that nothing is more beautiful, profound, sympathetic, reasonable, manly and more powerful than Christ.”
Quote Analysis
In this quote by Fyodor Dostoyevsky, the speaker describes the struggle of living in a time of disbelief and doubt, yet finding moments of peace and clarity in moments of connection with others. Despite the internal conflict and torment of thirsting for faith in a skeptical world, the speaker finds solace in the belief that nothing is more beautiful, profound, and powerful than Christ. It highlights the complex nature of faith and doubt, and the personal journey one must take to find meaning and purpose in a world full of uncertainty.
Modern Relevance
In the quote by Fyodor Dostoyevsky, we see the struggle between doubt and faith, a theme that resonates with many even in today's world. This inner conflict, the search for meaning and belief in a skeptical age, is something that many people can relate to. Despite the challenges and doubts that come with seeking faith, the moments of peace and connection experienced by the narrator highlight the importance of finding personal beliefs and truths in a chaotic and uncertain world.
Example of Usage
In this quote, Fyodor Dostoyevsky expresses his struggle with faith and doubt, highlighting the internal conflicts many individuals face when questioning their beliefs. Despite his skepticism, he finds moments of serenity and connection that reaffirm his belief in Christ. This complex relationship with faith reflects the ongoing internal battle that many people experience in their spiritual journey.
Reflection Questions
Contemplating the powerful words of Fyodor Dostoyevsky, consider the following questions to delve deeper into your own beliefs and convictions:
- How do you relate to the idea of being a child of disbelief and doubt in the modern era?
- Have you experienced moments of inner conflict between the thirst for faith and the arguments against it?
- Reflect on times when you have felt completely calm and loved by others. What beliefs or values do you hold onto during these moments?
- What does Christ symbolize for you personally? How do you interpret the beauty, depth, sympathy, reason, and power associated with him?
- In what ways do you find clarity and sacredness in your own beliefs, similar to how Dostoyevsky describes his "Credo"?
- How do you navigate the tension between doubt and faith in your own spiritual or philosophical journey?
Similar quotes
“There is so much deep contradiction in my soul. Such deep longing for God - so deep that it is painful - a suffering continual - and yet not wanted by God - repulsed - empty - no faith - no love - no zeal. Souls hold no attraction - Heaven means nothing - to me it looks like an empty place - the thought of it means nothing to me and yet this torturing longing for God. Pray for me please that I keep smiling at Him in spite of everything. For I am only His - so He has every right over me. I am perfectly happy to be nobody even to God. . . .Your devoted child in J.C.M. Teresa”
“For most of my life I have struggled to find God, to know God, to love God. I have tried hard to follow the guidelines of the spiritual life—pray always, work for others, read the Scriptures—and to avoid the many temptations to dissipate myself. I have failed many times but always tried again, even when I was close to despair.Now I wonder whether I have sufficiently realized that during all this time God has been trying to find me, to know me, and to love me. The question is not “How am I to find God?” but “How am I to let myself be found by him?” The question is not “How am I to know God?” but “How am I to let myself be known by God?” And, finally, the question is not “How am I to love God?” but “How am I to let myself be loved by God?” God is looking into the distance for me, trying to find me, and longing to bring me home.”
“Since I am determined to join myself to God, I find that I am also bound to be the enemy of his enemies. And since I find nothing that is more his enemy than the self that is me, I am constrained to hate this part of me more than any other.”
“I feel that from the very beginning life played a terrible conjurer’s trick on me. I lost faith in it. It seems to me that every moment now it is playing tricks on me. So that when I hear love I am not sure it is love, and when I hear gaiety I am not sure it is gaiety, and when I have eaten and loved and I am all warm from wine, I am not sure it is either love or food or wine, but a strange trick being played on me, an illusion, slippery and baffling and malicious, and a magician hangs behind me watching the ecstasy I feel at the things which happen so that I know deep down it is all fluid and escaping and may vanish at any moment. Don’t forget to write me a letter and tell me I was here, and I saw you, and loved you, and ate with you. It is all so evanescent and I love it so much, I love it as you love the change in the days.”
“I don't believe anyone ever suspects how completely unsure I am of my work and myself and what tortures of self-doubting the doubt of others has always given me.”