“The ill-informed masses included her own family among their ranks, a family that specialized in being both inconvenient and asinine.”

“What’s that?” she asked the girl, wrinkling her nose.“Oh, that? That’s just Pillover.”“And what’s a pillover, when it’s at home?”“My little brother.”“Ah, I commiserate. I have several of my own. Dashed inconvenient, brothers.”

“Someone was trying to kill Lady Alexia Maccon. It was most inconvenient, as she was in a dreadful hurry. Given her previous familiarity with near-death experiences and their comparative frequency with regards to her good self, Alexia should probably have allowed extra time for such a predictable happenstance.”

“I love him so very much. As Romeo did Jugurtha, as Pyramid did Thirsty, as-""Oh, please, no need to elaborate further," interjected Alexia, wincing."But what would my family SAY to such a union?""They would say that yours hats had leaked into your head," muttered Alexia, unheard under her breath.”

“What’s wrong with you? Are you ill? I forbid you to be ill, wife.”

“In this particular instance, he stroked her hand fondly. There was no attraction in the movement. "Sweetling," he had once said, "you are at no more risk with me in that regard than you are in danger of me unexpectedly biting you--both being equal impossibilities. In the one case, I do not possess the necessary equipment upon contact, in the other case you do not.”

“It was not a very prepossessing accessory for all it's serviceability, being both outlandish in design and indifferent in shape. It was a drab slate gray color, with cream ruffle trim, and it had a shaft in the new ancient-Egyptian style that looked rather like an elongated pineapple. Despite it's many advanced attributes, Lady Maccon's most common application of the parasol was through brute force enacted directly upon the cranium of an opponent. It was a crude and perhaps undignified modus operandi to be certain but it had worked so well for her in the past that she was loathe to rely too heavily on any of the newfangled aspects of her parasol's character. ”