“The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out his nose. ”

“My God, rich people have the time to praise You if they want to, but the poor people are so busy, accept their work as praise because, my God, they don’t have time for everything.”

“Life is unjust and this is what makes it so beautiful. Every day is a gift. Be brave and take hold of it.”

“A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded gun on your coffee table- There's nothing wrong with them, but it's hard to stop thinking about.”

“Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.”

“I've seen the truth, and it makes no sense.”

“They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad to realize that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days.”