“A book is a mirror; if an ass peers into it, you can't expect an apostle to peer out.”

“A sure sign of a good book is that you like it more the older you get.”

“When a book and a head collide and a hollow sound is heard, must it always have come from the book?”

“There is no mistaking a good book when one meets it. It is like falling in love.”

“If we thought more for ourselves we would have very many more bad books and very many more good ones.”

“Some people come by the name of genius in the same way that certain insects come by the name of centipede -- not because they have a hundred feet, but because most people can't count above 14.”

“If countries were named after the words you first hear when you go there, England would have to be called "Damn It".”