“The English are not a very spiritual people, so they invented cricket to give them some idea of eternity. ”

“Baseball has the great advantage over cricket of being sooner ended. ”

“The reason why the continental European is, to the Englishman or American, so surprisingly ignorant of the Bible, is that the authorized English version is a great work of literary art, and the continental versions are comparatively artless.”

“The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can't find them, make them.”

“I find it easy to forgive the man who invented a devilish instrument like dynamite, but how can one ever forgive the diabolical mind that invented the Nobel Prize in Literature?”

“People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can't find them, make them.”

“A man of my spiritual intensity does not eat corpses.”