“Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you've got it made. ”

“Sincerity - if you can fake that, you've got it made.”

“If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age. ”

“Money is the root of all evil.' Then we hear, 'A fool and his money are soon parted.' What are they talking about? If money is so evil, shouldn't it be, 'A wise man and his money are soon parted'? And another thing, how does a fool get money in the first place? I know some fools who have a lot of money, but they won't tell me how they got it, and I won't tell them.”

“Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.”

“Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, and a good woman - or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle.”

“I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.”