“I'm not denyin' the women are foolish. God Almighty made 'em to match the men.”

“No matter what the fight, don't be ladylike! God almighty made women and the Rockefeller gang of thieves made the ladies.”

“Women don't have a sense of humor. They don't need one. The Almighty made them as a permanent joke on men. From which one may logically deduce tha the Almighty is a female.”

“For I cannot think that GOD Almighty ever made them [women] so delicate, so glorious creatures; and furnished them with such charms, so agreeable and so delightful to mankind; with souls capable of the same accomplishments with men: and all, to be only Stewards of our Houses, Cooks, and Slaves.”

“I believe in children praying--well, women, too, but I rather think God expects men to be more self-reliant. I don't hold with a man everlastingly bothering the Almighty with his silly troubles.”

“Part of me suspects that I'm a loser, and the other part of me thinks I'm God Almighty.”