“The bad part is you freeze your balls off, but since you're not allowed to breed anyway, I don't suppose that matters.”

“Myth: Caffeine doesn't effect vampiresTruth: True, but I guess it doesn't matter, since you don't get tired anyway.”

“Sometimes the basketball gods don't allow the ball to bounce your way ..”

“You’re not allowed to freeze your ears off. All of the other mothers will make fun of me for having the bizarre earless offspring, and I don’t know if I’m secure enough to endure that.” “In that case, I should probably let my ears freeze off for the greater good. It sounds like you are in need of some serious character growth, Mamacita.”

“The stuffs you're good at and the stuffs you're bad at are just different parts of the same thing. Same goes for people you love and the people you don't. And the people who love you and the people who don't. The only thing that mattered was that you cared about a few people.”

“This life is what you make it. Not matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth. But the good part is you get to decide how you're going to mess it up. Girls will be your friends - they'll act like it anyway. But just remember, some come, somg go. The ones that stay with you through everything - they're your true best friends. Don't let go of them.”