“Momentarily forgetting how wind works, Lex tried spitting at him. This failed”

“Hang on," Driggs said as Lex pulled out Bone's note. "She might be right."Lex gave him a look. "You don't have to sound so shocked about it.""But it happens so rarely. Like an eclipse.”

“Lex froze. "What boy?""That boy I saw you with, before you came up to ring the bell. The windows of this house are fully functional, you know."Lex didn't even bother with a lie this time. "His name is Driggs. He's my partner.""Ah, partner. How very Law and Order.""Shut up, that's just how it works.""I see. And have you two had a romp in the hay yet, or would that upset Mr. Frizzle the rooster?”

“We were just showering," Lex muttered."Of course," Uncle Mort said. "Everyone knows how impossible it is to zestfully clean without assistance.”

“Let me tell you something right now, something that I don't want you ever to forget: Starbucks is an abomination."Lex was speechless. She now believed that there was no way in a million years this man could possibly be a blood relative.”

“After a minute or so, Lex pushed him away. "Stop.""Why?" He looked horrified. "What's wrong?""Nothing-""Was it that thing I did with my tongue?""Um, no. Your tongue and its many talents are perfect. Keep up the good work." She reached into her pocket and pulled out a crumpled-up scrap of paper.”

“Poison? Drugs?""No chemical works that instantly. You saw the guy - it looked like he was still reading his program.""Then what, magical fairy dust? Vulcan death grip?""Focus, Lex. Wake up that lonely brain cell.”