“Just the other day in the Underground I enjoyed the pleasure of offering my seat to three ladies.”

“Do not enjoy yourself. Enjoy dances and theaters and joy-rides and champagne and oysters; enjoy jazz and cocktails and night-clubs if you can enjoy nothing better; enjoy bigamy and burglary and any crime in the calendar, in preference to the other alternative; but never learn to enjoy yourself.”

“Roughly speaking, there are three kinds of people in the world…the division follows lines of real psychological cleavage. I do not offer it lightly. It has been the fruit of more than eighteen minutes of earnest reflection and research.”

“Flippancy is a flower whose roots are often underground in the subconsciousness.”

“Stories of magic alone can express my sense that life is not only a pleasure but a kind of eccentric privilege.”

“I shall approach. Before taking off his hat, I shall take off my own. I shall say, "The Marquis de Saint Eustache, I believe." He will say, "The celebrated Mr. Syme, I presume." He will say in the most exquisite French, "How are you?" I shall reply in the most exquisite Cockney, "Oh, just the Syme."''Oh shut it...what are you really going to do?''But it was a lovely catechism! ...Do let me read it to you. It has only forty-three questions and answers, some of the Marquis's answers are wonderfully witty. I like to be just to my enemy.''But what's the good of it all?' asked Dr. Bull in exasperation.'It leads up to the challenge...when the Marquis as given the forty-ninth reply, which runs--''Has it...occurred to you...that the Marquis may not say all the forty-three things you have put down for him?''How true that is! ...Sir, you have a intellect beyond the common.”

“What are blue-stockings?' asked Tommy.Naturally you don't know,' replied the other. 'If you did, you would sympathize more with Bluebeard. They were ladies who were always reading books. They even read them aloud.”