“Who's Evan?" Ian asked."Amy's boyfriend!""Amy, since when do you have a boyfriend?" Ian probed."Since none of your business!”

“Amy, since when do you have a boyfriend?”

“Sinead broke in. "The cops need to know what to do with Evan, Amy. What should I tell them?""Shoot to kill?" Ian suggested.”

“Where's Amy?" Ian put in. "Will you please get her to call that Evan character? He rings here twenty times a day. He's either the most mule-headed person who ever lived, or he really likes your sister. She has to have mercy on him–on all of us!”

“Who's that new guy with the snooty accent who came out and talked to the police?" Evan persisted. "He looks like some kind of male model.""That's just my cousin Ian," Amy explained."Not much of a family resemblance," Evan noted sourly."He's like a twenty-fifth cousin, ten times removed."Evan was not satisfied.”

“You're in trouble. Do you expect me to just walk away?""I wouldn't hold it against you if you did.""In know you wouldn't. That's only one of the reasons I'm crazy about you. I've got a million more.""Just a million?""Okay, a million plus one—your cat."She giggled. "You're bonding with Saladin?""Somebody has to protect that cat from your cousin Ian. And I feed him. The cat. Not Ian. He's on his own. Anyway, if that doesn't get me Perfect Boyfriend status, I don't know what will.""Emptying the litter box?""Hey. I have my limits."Amy laughed. She had the phone pressed to her ear so tightly it burned. She closed her eyes, picturing his face...Ian's crisp voice broke in. "All right, lovebirds, let's move on. No offense, but I believe Amy and Dan might need a short course in style and class.""Is this the nonoffensive part?" Dan asked. "I can't wait until you really insult us.""Let's deal with reality, shall we? You don't just walk into an auction house in your jeans and backpacks. You have to blend in. And that's going to be hard." Ian sniffed. "Considering that you're Americans.""What are you talking about, dude?" Dan asked. "This is my best SpongeBob T-shirt.”