“I shouted the perfect words to scare him off. It was just the delivery (and only the delivery) that made me sound like a twelve-year-old girl with pee running down her leg. I felt dirty and stupid.”

“I didn't want to do it,' Kiala said. 'The universe just kind of conspired to force me to make a fool of myself. It does that quite a lot, actually.”

“Just before I look under my bed, I always get a little cold feeling, as if part of me expects to find something staring back at me.I've probably seen too many Hollywood movies to have any hopes of ever cultivating a healthy relationship with the underside of my bed.”

“My Zombie apocalypse plan is simple but effective; I fully intend to die in the very first wave.Seems more logical than undergoing all kinds of hardships only to die eventually anyway (through bites/malnutrition/or terminally chapped lips)”

“I'm not sure my belly button is exactly in the middle. I wonder what that means..”

“Instead of heading for a big mental breakdown, I decided to have a small breakdown every Tuesday evening.”

“Sadly, my socks are like snowflakes, no two are exactly alike.”