“I am not Chewbacca. Me think Chewbacca jerk. He no can act. He ride Bigfoot coat tails. he think he cool, but he not. He phoney loser with no class. He all messed up on crack me think. People think me Chewbacca sometimes. No! Me have job. Bad wookie. Bad.”

“i busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five.”

“That's not such a bad thing,' he said to me. 'In nightmares we can think the worst. That's what they're for, I guess.”

“Here I thought he was thinking of kissing me and he was thinking of ....... dogs?”

“He’ll think I’ll do it, he’ll act like I’ll do it, and so I will do it. But if he will think differently, maybe I will act differently. But I know me, I know him, he knows himself, he knows me, and he is my clone, so we will each act exactly how we think we will, and we will each act like the other, and this is why I’ll have to kill him.”

“You think I gave you crack?""Maybe."Is there anything about me that screams crack?"He grinned as he swayed. "Your butt crack," he whispered before dissolving into giggles.”