“A man is only as old as the woman he feels.”

“Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.”

“Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other 999 follow women.”

“There's one way to find out if a man is honest - ask him. If he says "yes" you know he is a crook.”

“Groucho: You know I think you're the most beautiful woman in the world?Woman: Really?Groucho: No, but I don't mind lying if it gets me somewhere.”

“Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.”

“Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman. Then if you can get the dog to go somewhere and read the book, I might have a little fun.”