“John you say you met in an elevator. Was the elevator going up at the time, or down? This is very important, for going down in an elevator one always has that sinking feeling and for all I know you may have this confused with love. If you were going up, it is clearly a case of love at first sight...”

“I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.”

“Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman. Then if you can get the dog to go somewhere and read the book, I might have a little fun.”

“Hello, I must be going, I cannot stay,I came to say, I must be going.I’m glad I came, but just the same,I must be going.”

“I've got a good mind to go out and join a club and beat you over the head with it.”

“Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, and I'm going to be happy in it.”

“From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.”