“Whatever it is, I'm against it.”

“I'm not crazy about reality, but it's still the only place to get a decent meal.”

“Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, and I'm going to be happy in it.”

“I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.”

“Come on in girls, and leave all hope behind.”

“I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.”

“The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around. If you write about someone else, you can stretch the truth from here to Finland. If you write about yourself the slightest deviation makes you realize instantly that there may be honor among thieves, but you are just a dirty liar.”