“I went home that day, and I wrote your name over and over on a piece of paper. I must have written it a hundred times. My mom found the paper a few days later in my sock drawer. She wanted to know why I'd done that..."I wanted to know why more than anything I'd ever remembered wanting, but a part of me hoped he'd chicken out."I told her I liked the way your name made my heart jump.”

“Who was your first kiss?” Heat rushed into my face. I flattered myself by thinking maybe he wanted to kiss me. I wished he wanted to kiss me. “I haven’t …” Squeezing my eyes closed, I began again. “I haven’t been kissed. Yet.” “Why?” I rolled my eyes at his innocence. “You obviously know I’m not like other girls. I’m shy and I don’t spend time with boys. My father is strict and—” “That’s not why.” He thought he knew me so well.“Fine. You tell me why I haven’t been kissed.” I regretted the words and my tone instantly. What if he told me what I already knew? That I was lacking. Not interesting or pretty enough. “You were waiting.”

“This isn't a crush, it's obsession.You are never not in my thoughts. Your scent carries across a room and paralyzes me with longing. I don't want to hold your hand. Part of me wants to set you on fire and hold you while the flame consumes us both, to eat your heart so I know that only I possess it entirely.”

“I don’t understand.” Except, truthfully, I just didn’t want to understand.Pain shadowed across his face. “Darkness lives in me, Theia. Inside of me. Like a sickness. And right next to it, intertwined with it, are my feelings for you. If I act on one, I’ll act on the other. The darkness in me wants you the way a black hole eats stars. I dream of tasting you, devouring you.” His eyes darkened terribly. “Haden, stop trying to frighten me.” He carried on as if he hadn’t heard me. “This isn’t a crush; it’s an obsession. You are never not in my thoughts. Your scent carries across a room and paralyzes me with longing. I don’t want to hold your hand. Part of me wants to set you on fire and hold you while the flame consumes us both, to eat your heart so I know that only I possess it entirely. Are you scared now? Does your human mind comprehend the danger at last? I’m not like you. I’m not human, not completely anyway.”

“She wiped her eye and pressed her lips together. “I sleep in your room. I’m fairly pathetic about it, really. I wear your T-shirts to bed and watchyour movies.” She paused. “And you don’t even remember me.”This time I stopped walking. “Do you think it’s easy for me?” She had gotten a few steps ahead and turned to look back at me. “No, I don’tremember you. I don’t remember holding you or talking to you or falling in love with you—but I walk around with a giant hole in my heart all the time. Ifeel your absence every second of the day. It aches and nothing soothes it. Losing you is bad enough, but I don’t even get the comfort ofremembering that I had you once.”

“I don't know how I'd made it seventeen years without kissing. It was the finest thing I'd ever known. Like stumbling into heaven.”

“Do you think it’s easy for me? No, I don’t remember you. I don’t remember holding you or talking to you or falling in love with you—but I walk around with a giant hole in my heart all the time. I feel your absence every second of the day. It aches and nothing soothes it. Losing you is bad enough, but I don’t even get the comfort of remembering that I had you once.-Haden”