“It’s true that I never want to hurt you. But I can’t promise you that I never would" -Haden”

“I just called to tell you good night. Get some sleep, Theia. Tomorrow is a big day.”“I would sleep much better if you were here.” As soon as the words spilled out of my mouth,I wanted to die of embarrassment. Haden and I were close, but we hadn’t gotten that close yet. “I mean . . . it’s just that when you’re near I’m not as agitated. Not that I want to sleep with you.” I needed to stop talking—I was making it worse.“You don’t?” He was teasing now. “Now you’ve hurt my male pride.”

“Theia: "We're very high up here, aren't we?" Haden: "Well, you certainly are. Theia, I need you to wake up." Theia: "Did you know that I have never seen a penis?" He laughed again. "When you wake up, you are going to hate yourself.”

“Do you think it’s easy for me? No, I don’t remember you. I don’t remember holding you or talking to you or falling in love with you—but I walk around with a giant hole in my heart all the time. I feel your absence every second of the day. It aches and nothing soothes it. Losing you is bad enough, but I don’t even get the comfort of remembering that I had you once.-Haden”

“I don’t understand.” Except, truthfully, I just didn’t want to understand.Pain shadowed across his face. “Darkness lives in me, Theia. Inside of me. Like a sickness. And right next to it, intertwined with it, are my feelings for you. If I act on one, I’ll act on the other. The darkness in me wants you the way a black hole eats stars. I dream of tasting you, devouring you.” His eyes darkened terribly. “Haden, stop trying to frighten me.” He carried on as if he hadn’t heard me. “This isn’t a crush; it’s an obsession. You are never not in my thoughts. Your scent carries across a room and paralyzes me with longing. I don’t want to hold your hand. Part of me wants to set you on fire and hold you while the flame consumes us both, to eat your heart so I know that only I possess it entirely. Are you scared now? Does your human mind comprehend the danger at last? I’m not like you. I’m not human, not completely anyway.”

“He smiled. I was unprepared for my reaction to the most potent weapon Haden had in his arsenal—a real smile, one that reached his eyes.One genuine emotion was enough to unravel my life from the security of everything I’d ever known.For seventeen years, I’d tried to live Father’s way. Each step measured, my words carefully chosen. In his fortress of fears, I grew up—but not strong. I yearned to replace the hole in his heart left by my mother, so my life never belonged to me. My own heart was my weakest muscle, never exercised, never even flexed.Suddenly, I understood that it still miraculously worked. And it was full. So full it felt like rays of sunshine were bursting through my chest, poking out of me in radiant splendor. Haden spellbound me and life changed to Technicolor. In his smile, I felt the bindings that tethered my spirit rip away.”

“Haden flashed me a grin. “You ever been stumping?”“Er … I don’t even know what that is.”“It involves muddy logging roads, four-wheel drive, and holding on to the ‘oh, shit’ handle above your door.”