“I've learned that you know your husband still loves you when there are two brownies left and he takes the smaller one.”

“I've learned that it doesn't matter how your husband squeezes the toothpaste, the important thing is how he squeezes you.”

“One thing I've learned: you never know where life is taking you, but it's taking you.”

“You know when you've found it that's something I've learned, cause you feel it when they take it away.”

“Though her husband often went on business trips, she hated to be left alone."I've solved your problem," he said. "I've bought you a St. Bernard. Its name is Great Reluctance. Now, when I go away, you shall know that I am leaving you with Great Reluctance!"She hit him with a waffle iron.”

“There in that pool stained with green blood, he had learned two things: one was that all the pain stopped when you stopped fighting death; and the other was that as long as you could still hear your heart beating, you had to keep fighting back.”