“To die for an idea; it is unquestionably noble. But how much nobler it would be if men died for ideas that were true!”

“Platitude: an idea (a) that is admitted to be true by everyone, and (b) that is not true.”

“Any man who afflicts the human race with ideas must be prepared to see them misunderstood. ”

“College football would be much more interesting if the faculty played instead of the students, and even more interesting if the trustees played. There would be a great increase in broken arms, legs, and necks, and simultaneously an appreciable diminution in the loss of humanity.”

“There are some people who read too much: the bibliobibuli. I know some who are constantly drunk on books, as other men are drunk on whiskey or religion. They wander through this most diverting and stimulating of worlds in a haze, seeing nothing and hearing nothing.”

“On one issue, at least, men and women agree: they both distrust women.”

“Men become civilized, not in proportion to their willingness to believe, but in proportion to their readiness to doubt.”