“It is easier for most of us to affirm positive behavior than to deal with negative behavior in a positive way.”

“Everyone has quirks of behavior and personality that at times irritate us. Yet in most cases the problem isn't that they are bad; its simply that their responses and thought patterns are different from ours.Every person is different. Yet often, those differences are not understood or valued by others. Trying to change one's personality to match yours is as pointless and as futile as trying to change one's physical features to make him or her look like you. The key to reducing frustration over one's quirks of behavior and to communicate with him or her is to understand and accommodate their unique personality style.”

“Convey nurturing messages both verbally and nonverbally. If you fill one's life with positive messages of their value to you and to God, they wll develop self-worth and self-disciplines, and become responsible independent adults. Ideally, communication should be filled with nurturing messages.”

“In marriage, each partner is to be an encourager rather than a critic; a forgiver rather than a collector of hurts; an enabler rather than a reformer.”

“Nurturing words show that you believe in the other party's capacity to learn, change and grow. One's mind is like a computer. Every message you send goes into one of two files: discounting or nurturing. The file with the most data will direct how one sees and feels about himself or herself. Messages that nurture are based on unconditional love which must be worked at, especially if you come from a discounting family. You will need to rely on Jesus to fill the void in your life with His presence and help you learn how to love unconditionall like He loves us.”

“Listening is a gift of spiritual significance that you can learn to give to others. When you listen, you give one a sense of importance, hope and love that he or she may not receive any other way. Through listening, we nurture and validate the feelings one has, especially when he or she experiences difficulties in life.”

“Sometimes we disfigure ourselves by what we think about ourselves rather than by what we do to ourselves. Some people have been disfigured emotionally because of what others did to them when they were children. Sometimes our memory banks become warehouses of beliefs and feelings that cripple our progress.”